Every conflict is an opportunity to show love, although many times you are going to feel like a point must be made. Your influence is directly tied to your relationship, and conflict is always an opportunity to show love and to serve in some way. When you choose to love and serve others, it has the potential to begin to break the cycle. This week we are going to discuss how God has given us a way that provides us with everything we need to deal with the issues that we face when the vibe goes bad.
1. Read Romans 12:9–10. How does Paul describe what love is?
2. Why do you think we often struggle with hating what is evil?
3. Read Romans 12:14-17. Before we discuss what it means to live like this, what is our primary purpose in life? (See 1 Corinthians 10:31 if you need help). How does living like what Paul just described bring glory to God? Can you think of someone you know who embodies this description given by Paul? How have you seen that person bring glory to God?
4. Pastor James taught us that when we are in a conflict, we need to think and respond in a way that is right. Should this response be driven by compassion or conviction?
5. You may have struggled with the previous question. What Paul is telling us in Romans 12 is that instead of reacting in the midst of conflict, we are to think through what we can do that is good for the other person . . . to do what is right, even when what they do is wrong. Why is it so hard for us to love people especially when they have hurt us in one way or another?
6. Read Romans 12:19-21. Paul is getting serious now. If Paul followed you around, what do you think he would have to say about how you deal with people?
7. The best way to get someone to listen to you and listen to God is through serving them, not trying to fix them. It’s through loving them, and in that love, God begins to work. In what ways can we hinder God’s work in someone’s life if we take matters into our own hands?
8. Pastor James said we are to “commit to restoration, not just a resolution.” What is the difference between restoration and resolution? Look back to Romans 12:9-10, which of the two do you think Paul would like you to work towards in your relationship?